The Best Goodbye Read online

  “No, I’m going in. She’s been threatening for weeks to send me away. I don’t want to give her a reason.” I knew that using my fear of leaving him would be the only way he would agree.

  “I won’t let her.”

  “River, you can’t stop her.”

  “She won’t send you away, because she knows I’ll report her. I’ll call social services. I’ll leave, too. She knows it. You’re not going to be taken away from me.” The determination in his voice made me feel safe, even though I was standing outside a house with a madwoman raging inside.

  “She’s on the phone with Dad,” he said, reaching down to squeeze my hand. “Go to the pond for me.”

  I shook my head. “No. I won’t leave you here.”

  River sighed, then turned to face me and placed both of his hands on my shoulders. He towered over me now at six feet. “Addy, please. I can handle her and calm her down. But if she hurts you, I will hurt her. I don’t want to hurt my mother. She needs help. I need to go in there knowing you’re safe.”

  I stared up at him, wishing he wasn’t right. “I hate you having to deal with her alone. I hate being the reason.”

  He pulled me close to him and lowered his mouth to my ear. “You’re my reason for everything.” Then he kissed me on the cheek and straightened back up.

  In the midst of this insane moment, I had butterflies in my stomach going crazy. But he always had that effect on me. “I can’t remember what my life was like before you,” I told him honestly. “And I don’t want to remember.”

  He smirked. “I remember what mine was like before you, and I don’t ever want to live without you again.”

  Captain

  After our ice-cream date, Addy agreed to bring Franny over for dinner in three days on her night off. I was trying to give them both time to adjust to having me in their lives, but I sure as hell didn’t want to wait that long. Watching Franny talk was fascinating. She was a ball of energy, and I felt like I had a lifetime to make up for with her.

  The paperwork on my desk was waiting for me, but my head wasn’t on work. It was on the two girls in my life. The only two I would ever love.

  A knock interrupted my thoughts. “Come in,” I called out.

  Brad opened the door and stepped inside. I’d left a message for him to come see me. I had something we needed to discuss, and the kitchen wasn’t the place to do it.

  “Hey, you need me?” he asked, looking like he’d just crawled out of bed.

  “Late night?” I asked, hoping he’d say yes. I wanted his attention off of Addy.

  He nodded. “Yeah, I was up late trying a new idea for a menu. Took me three tries, but I think I nailed it. I’ll make it today and let you try.” The guy was obsessed with food, but that was what made him the best.

  “You do that,” I replied. “Close the door, and have a seat.”

  Today the new manager was coming into the restaurant, which was going to give me more time to spend with Franny—and her mother. Because I intended to spend time with Addy. Even if she seemed unsure about me.

  “Brad, what’s your relationship with Ad—I mean, Rose?” I corrected myself quickly. Calling her Rose was hard now. Remembering at work would be difficult. Explaining a name change to everyone wouldn’t be easy.

  Brad frowned and shifted in his seat. “Nothing yet. I mean, I think we’re friends. I like spending time with her. Is that against policy? I assumed since you dated Elle, it was OK.”

  He went from nervous to defensive fast. “No, it isn’t against policy, but I’m going to ask you to step back in your pursuit of Rose.”

  His frown deepened. “Why?”

  Because she was my Addy, and I didn’t want him fucking near her and making her laugh. “Because you have a kitchen to make first-class. Flirting with the servers isn’t something you have time for. Rose has a daughter. She needs to focus on that when she’s not here. So back off.”

  Brad stared at me a moment, then moved to stand up. “Not sure how me being her friend and seeing her after hours affects any of that. She’s the best server we have, and you know it. She doesn’t let anything affect that.”

  He needed to back down. My hands clenched tightly as I glared at him. “Don’t push me on this,” I said, lowering my voice to meet his challenge.

  “Do you like her? Is that what this is about? Because last time I checked, she isn’t your speed. You go for the Elles of the world. And Rose isn’t like Elle. Not even close.”

  I agreed with him completely on that. “I’m watching out for her. That’s all. You can leave now.” I didn’t want to leave any room for argument.

  He looked like he wanted to say more, but he didn’t. I knew how I looked to him right now. He wasn’t going to say anything with the warning in my glare. With a frustrated expression, he turned and left my office.

  That had gone as expected, but it had to be done. Brad was the best chef around here, and I’d hate to fire him because he couldn’t back off from Addy.

  • • •

  I got lost for the next few hours in paperwork and phone calls. When Jamieson Tynes finally showed up, I was annoyed and relieved. Arthur had said he’d be coming today, and I needed him here now more than ever. He would be my way to create the free time I needed for my daughter.

  Leaving Rosemary Beach was no longer the plan. I’d come to terms with that immediately. Time with Franny and Addy was my top priority. I wanted to introduce them to my sister and bring them into my world. But Addy needed more first. She wasn’t the same trusting girl who’d looked to me for everything.

  My chest ached at the thought. I wanted that back. I wanted her looking at me as if she knew I’d make it all better. I knew she was strong. God, she’d proven that already with the way she had survived and raised our daughter. She was so much stronger than I realized.

  But I didn’t want her to have to be so fucking strong. I wanted to be there to give her someone to lean on. To share life with. My feelings for her had never changed. Even when I’d thought she was dead, she’d controlled me. She was the only reason I held on to the sliver of soul I had left. I wanted to keep some part of me for her. Even if she wasn’t here.

  “Are you Captain?” Jamieson asked, and I realized I’d gotten lost in my thoughts of Addy.

  I stood up and held out my hand. “Yeah, that’s me. I assume you’re Jamieson.”

  He shook my hand and nodded. “Sorry I’m late. My flight from Dallas was delayed.”

  Just so, he was here. “No worries. I had stuff that I needed to straighten out this morning. I’ll spend the rest of the day showing you the place and introducing you to the employees.”

  Jamieson was younger than me, but he had that fresh-out-of-business-school look about him, with his slacks and Oxford shirt. I knew he was taking in my faded jeans and black T-shirt. Sure, I always changed clothes before dinner service began, but during the day, I was comfortable. He’d need to learn to relax a little, too.

  “Great. I’m excited about this opportunity.”

  I refrained from rolling my eyes. He was a kid. He’d lose that enthusiasm soon enough. He was about to enter the real world.

  I walked past him and opened the door. “We’ll start in the kitchen, and I’ll show you around the back side of things. Introduce you to the culinary staff. We’ll meet with the servers when they arrive in an hour.”

  Jamieson pulled an iPad Mini out of his briefcase. What the hell was he doing? “Can I leave my bag here?” he asked.

  I just nodded, still trying to figure out what the iPad was for.

  “Great. I’m ready to take diligent notes,” he explained, holding up the iPad.

  This was going to be interesting.

  Addy

  Franny had begged to come to work with me tonight. She wanted to hang out in the back with Captain. She didn’t understand that he was busy all evening, and he couldn’t have her tagging along. But from the moment we had gotten back to the car after ice cream, she had talked nonstop abo
ut her father. She didn’t call him Captain anymore, either. She referred to him as her dad when she talked about him to me. I knew she liked the way it sounded, but I worried that she was rushing things.

  They both needed to ease into this.

  Or maybe I needed them to ease into it. Maybe it was just me who needed space and time to adjust. Franny had been mine alone for so long. Sharing her like this—her emotions, her love—was hard. I hadn’t expected that. I wanted her to have everything. I wanted her to know her father. I just didn’t want her ever to feel like I hadn’t been enough. That was my insecurity, though, and I knew it.

  “Meeting in the dining room. The manager Captain’s training to take over is here. I hear he’s young and super hot,” Patricia informed me, as I went to stow my purse in the employee lounge.

  “OK,” I replied.

  I knew Captain wasn’t planning on staying. Everyone knew that. He hadn’t kept that from everyone. But I hoped he wasn’t leaving town. Not soon. Not now that I’d brought him into Franny’s life.

  “Dining room, now. Everyone,” Elle called out in a bossy tone as she stepped into the room. Her gaze leveled on me, then she spun around and stalked off.

  “Who wants to bet she fucks around with this one before the end of the week?” Daniel, one of the servers I didn’t know well, whispered. Several of the others giggled quietly and muffled their laughter.

  I really hoped she would, but that was a selfish hope I wasn’t going to explore. I didn’t need to think about it.

  “You’re not wearing your glasses,” Natalie Orchard said, smiling at me. “I knew something was different about you. I like you in contacts. Your eyes are killer awesome.”

  There was no reason for me to wear the fake glasses now. I didn’t explain that I didn’t wear contacts. Instead, I just thanked her and followed everyone to the dining room.

  I was unable to keep myself from scanning the room for Captain, and my eyes landed on him, then quickly looked away. I didn’t want him to catch me looking at him. I was still confused about my feelings for him. When he was with Franny, I saw River in his expression. The hardness melted away, and the smile that used to make all the bad things in my life OK would touch his lips, and I would feel a tug I didn’t want to feel. I wasn’t ready to feel. I was afraid to feel.

  “He’s yummy,” a female server whispered.

  “He’s all college-sexy,” another said behind her hand.

  “Dammit. He’s straight. I can tell from here,” Kyle muttered under his breath. That got me smiling. Kyle had been lusting after Captain from afar since the first day. He was open about how attractive he thought Captain was and how Captain’s dangerous vibe made him sweaty and achy. That was more than I’d wanted to hear.

  “No, he’s definitely into girls. He’s already checking Elle out,” Natalie grumbled.

  “Because she’s flirting with him,” Daniel replied. “She’s either trying to make Captain jealous or mark her territory.”

  “Captain’s not even paying attention. He’s looking this way,” Kyle said in a whisper. Then he turned to look at me and glanced back at Captain. “Or he’s looking at Rose. You do look dayum good without glasses.”

  I smiled at Kyle. “Thank you.”

  He swung his gaze back to the front of the room and nodded. “Yep. He’s checking out Rose.”

  I didn’t want to look, but I was curious. Slowly, I turned my gaze to his, and our eyes locked immediately. He was watching me closely. A small smile tugged at the corners of his mouth, and I couldn’t keep myself from smiling back.

  “That shit’s hot,” Kyle drawled, and I jerked my gaze away from Captain and stared at my feet. Kyle chuckled, and Natalie let out a low whistle.

  “Wowee. Someone caught the bad boy’s attention. He’s scary and hot all at the same time,” Kyle said.

  I ignored that. They didn’t know Captain. They didn’t know the boy he was or the life he had endured. But I didn’t know what he’d lived through over the past ten years. Maybe the dangerous vibe they all got was real. An image of him laughing with Franny over a story she told him came back to me, and I shook the thought away. He wasn’t dangerous. They just thought his slightly too long, sun-streaked hair pulled back in a man bun and the thick scruff on his face made him look dangerous. But I liked that scruff. I liked it a lot. It made me think about things. Things I hadn’t had in a very long time.

  “Someone’s face is bright red. What did I miss?” Hillary asked as she stepped up beside me.

  “Oh, just boss man up there, checking Rose out,” Kyle supplied.

  “How do you know he’s not checking me out?” Hillary asked in a haughty tone.

  “Because you just got here, and he’s been zeroed in on that one since she walked into the room,” Natalie replied, clearly enjoying herself. There was friction between them that I hadn’t noticed before.

  “Well, short stuff needs to get in line. He’s mine next. Elle is moving to the new guy, it seems, and I want some of that badass up there. He’ll look elsewhere once I get him alone for five minutes,” Hillary said, then brushed past us with a sway in her hips, straight for Captain.

  “She’s a bitch,” Natalie said in a disgusted tone.

  “Most women are,” Kyle said, then winked our way. “Present company excluded.”

  I wanted to continue to look at the floor or out the window. Anywhere but where my gaze was determined to go. I had to watch. I wasn’t sure why. So what if she flirted with him and he liked it? He was my daughter’s father. He was my past. I had no claim on him. But when she leaned in to whisper in his ear and his attention shifted from me to her, my heart cracked just a little. I couldn’t help it. Old habits die hard.

  “God, I hope he’s smarter than that,” Natalie muttered.

  “Oh, he’ll fuck her. His kind always takes the hot, easy fucks. They just don’t commit. That’s part of the sexy bad-boy thing that makes us all crazy,” Kyle said.

  “That’s a shame,” Natalie whispered, sounding as let down as I felt.

  Captain lowered his head and responded to Hillary, while she kept a flirty, pleased smile on her face. What were they doing? Making plans for later? My gut twisted, and I hated it. I hated it so bad.

  “You’re dating Brad, aren’t you?” Daniel asked. I looked at him and hoped the inner turmoil I was experiencing wasn’t showing on my face.

  “No, not really. We’re friends is all,” I corrected him. Brad flirted, but he didn’t do more than that. He didn’t call me or text me. We only talked at work, and he was a great guy, but I didn’t want more from him. I liked the easy friendship we had fallen into.

  “Ah, he just looks at you a lot, so I figured there was something more there,” Daniel explained.

  I didn’t say anything to that. I was unaware that Brad looked at me a lot. I rarely looked in his direction unless we were talking.

  Captain cleared his throat to get the room’s attention. “OK, everyone. We’re all here, so it’s time to introduce you to your soon-to-be manager. Jamieson Tynes has been sent by Arthur Stout to take over in the next few weeks. While he’s here, you’re to make yourselves available for any questions. I’ll start taking off a few nights a week and letting Jamieson take over, so the decisions and orders will be coming from him. Jamieson, I’m going to let you take it from here. This is your serving staff. Get to know them.”

  I looked at Jamieson, wondering if this bunch would eat him alive. He looked really young and naive.

  “Oh, shit, here he comes,” Kyle whispered. I looked up and saw the group of servers part like the Red Sea.

  Captain.

  “He’s so determined. Sexy.” Kyle made a strange pleased sound under his breath.

  I couldn’t look away this time. I watched wide-eyed as Captain came for me. There was a gleam in his eyes that excited me, but I wasn’t sure what it meant.

  “Rose, come with me,” he said, loudly enough for the others to hear, although it was a soft demand.

/>   I just nodded and followed him to his office. I was afraid to look at anyone else, but I could feel their eyes glued on us. Waiting to see what was going on.

  I followed him obediently, because honestly, I wasn’t sure anyone had ever told that man no. When had he learned to pack so much power into just one intent gaze and a few words?

  When his office door opened, I went in right behind him, wondering if it was a mistake. He was in a strange mood, and I didn’t know how I was connected to it. When I stepped inside, he closed the door, and I jumped a little at the loud click.

  “You wouldn’t look at me,” he said in a tight, thick voice.

  I had looked at him. Did he miss that? We were looking right at each other before Hillary came into the room. “I don’t know what you mean,” I said, slightly breathless from the intense atmosphere in the room.

  “No, you were looking at me, and then you stopped and wouldn’t look at me again.”

  How was he making the oxygen in the room so thin? I tried to take a deep breath. “I looked away when you did,” I said in a whisper.

  Captain took a step toward me, and the rest of the oxygen in the room evaporated. I needed to hold on to something. This wasn’t a mood I’d seen him in before. I had no idea how to deal with it. “I don’t want her. She offered. I sent her away. But you wouldn’t look at me,” he said, his voice so deep and raspy that I couldn’t keep my chest from rising and falling with each short intake of air.

  “Oh,” I choked out, watching the storm in his eyes. The green had darkened to hazel, and the hard line of his mouth eased into something more . . . seductive. My legs felt weak.

  “Yeah. Oh,” he repeated. “Why didn’t you look at me?”

  Because I didn’t like it. I had no reason not to like it, but I didn’t. “I don’t know,” I lied.

  The sharp upturn of the corners of his mouth told me he didn’t believe me. But the fullness of those lips was fascinating. I could watch them up close like this all day and never get bored. Had they been that full all those years ago? Or had I been too young to appreciate the beauty of his mouth?