Losing the Field Page 11

  I didn’t want to go to Haegan’s. I still wasn’t sold on this guy. He’d been so odd at the game. He’d tried to make me uncomfortable. I didn’t like that. But Nash liked him, and I liked Nash. I had to give Haegan another chance.

  “Okay. If Haegan doesn’t mind,” I replied, suddenly thinking Haegan might mind. He didn’t seem like he’d want me around.

  “He won’t mind. I swear, he’s the most laid-back person I have ever met.”

  The warning bell rang. Nash leaned over and pressed a quick kiss to my lips. “Glad you’re back,” he whispered, surprising me. My cheeks heated, and my heart fluttered.

  “Me too,” I said with a shaky voice.

  Nash saw my reaction, and his grin was a pleased one. “See you after class,” he said, then turned and headed toward his next class.

  I watched him go only a second before hurrying across the hall and three doors down to my first period. It wasn’t until I was almost to my class that I realized . . . Nash’s limp had been better. He’d walked straighter. Taller.

  He was confident again.

  I didn’t know if it was me or Haegan who had inspired that. It didn’t matter. He was changing. Back to the Nash I knew. The guy who smiled easy. The guy who walked like he had the world in his hands.

  I Was Still Nash Fucking Lee

  CHAPTER 26

  NASH

  The high-pitched scream caught my attention along with all the rest of the student body, and everyone began pouring into the hallway from their first-period class. The bell had just rung, and we’d all been moving slow as was typical for morning classes. Most of us needed caffeine. But you could bet a fight would wake us all up.

  When I made it through the crowd, shoving to get a good view of what was more than likely two girls going at it from the scream we’d all heard, I saw Haegan with his hands up in the air, trying to stop whatever was going on. I pushed through and got close enough to see Pam, which was no surprise if this was about Haegan, and Julie Winters tied up. Pam had a handful of Julie’s red curly hair, and Julie was slapping the shit out of Pam’s face. It was already looking bright red.

  The crowd was cheering and laughing. Haegan looked confused as hell and tried to no avail to calm them down. “Excuse me,” I said to the guy in front of me. He stepped out of my way, and I almost got to Haegan before he made the mistake of stepping into that mix. Pam’s elbow clocked him in the jaw, and she realized it with a horrified look.

  The distraction, however, cost her a fist to the nose that wasn’t that forceful, since Julie was five feet tall and about one hundred pounds on a good day. I was shocked she was in a fight. I couldn’t remember ever seeing her fight before. Her temper was fierce for a tiny girl, but never like this.

  Pam covered her nose as if that had actually hurt. “OHMYGOD!” she cried out. The damage she did to Haegan’s jaw was no doubt worse than anything done to her nose. Julie shoved her in the chest. “Come on, bitch! You want to talk smack now!”

  Pam’s eyes went wide before clouding over into crazy as hell. Someone needed to get Julie out of her reach. Pam was taller and stronger.

  “Jesus! What’s wrong with the two of you?” Haegan said, grabbing Julie’s arm this time and pulling her back. Bad idea.

  Julie’s brother wasn’t tiny. Joseph Winters broke through the crowd at that time and knocked Pam into Haegan and then grabbed his sister to tuck her protectively against his side. “I don’t care if you’re a girl, Pam. Touch her again and I am beating your ass,” Joseph warned her loudly.

  “No one needs to hit the girls. They’re mutually at fault here,” Haegan said, stepping in front of Pam. I was impressed with that move. Had to give him credit. But Joseph was about to take this out on him, and I had to move fast. I shoved between the girls in front of me and stood beside Haegan to stare down Joseph. Didn’t have any issue with the guy, but he needed to back off and take his sister with him. Haegan hadn’t done anything.

  “You challenging me, crip?” Joseph asked, taking a step toward me. That was the first time someone had actually called me a cripple. It didn’t go over well. My hands clenched, and adrenaline surged through my body.

  “What the fuck did you just say?” Ryker’s voice carried loud, and people parted to let him through.

  Joseph turned to see Ryker and Asa step up beside me.

  “I asked if he was challenging me,” Joseph said, his voice not so loud now. “I’m just getting my sister out of this crazy shit. I didn’t come to fight.”

  Ryker stepped in front of me. Like I needed protecting. Like I was exactly what Joseph had just called me. Fuck that. I stepped around my cousin. “I don’t need you to protect me,” I snarled. Pissed he thought that I did.

  “Would you like me to show you exactly what this crip can do to you? Without their help,” I said loud and clear for the onlookers to hear.

  I could see in Joseph’s eyes he wanted to take me up on it. But he wouldn’t. Because he was afraid of the guys standing behind me. That stung. I needed to prove myself. I wanted them all to see that I was still me. I was still Nash Fucking Lee. Football didn’t make me who I was. I could still whup his ass.

  “I’m not fighting you,” he said simply.

  That was a trigger. I snapped. Just as I lunged at him, another female war cry went out, and arms wrapped around me, pulling me back. “Calm down or you’re going to get suspended,” Ryker said as he held me back. “Let Pam get in trouble instead.”

  I jerked free of his hold just as Pam slid back across the floor and Mandy B—I didn’t know her last name—jumped on top of her, and they began pulling hair. What the fuck had happened now?

  Haegan sighed in frustration and went to grab Mandy off Pam to stop this fight, but Mandy B’s boyfriend grabbed Haegan’s arm, and fists were thrown. I needed a fight. Ryker wasn’t stopping this. I had something to prove. I swung, and my fist met Tim’s right jaw. We’d played football together. We’d laughed together in the locker room. But none of that mattered. Not anymore.

  “Stop it!” Coach D was suddenly in the middle of all this, and he was grabbing Haegan’s arms and pulling him back. I hated the man. Seeing him there with his hands on my friend infuriated me. Where had he been when this shit started? Now he wanted to jump in and grab the wrong fucking person?

  “Back the fuck off!” I all but roared as I started toward Coach D. “He’s not the one you need to be grabbing!”

  “Nash,” Ryker’s tone was warning.

  “Excuse me? I don’t believe I need confirmation from a violent teenage boy,” Coach D replied, his cheeks red. He was angry. Good. Let him snap. His ass would get fired.

  “You don’t even know what’s going on. Let him go!” I reached out to take Coach D’s hands off Haegan myself.

  Coach D released him. “Both of you to the principal’s office.”

  Was he serious? There had been two girl brawls, and he was sending us to the office? What about Tim? “Just us? Out of all the fighting, you’re sending us?” I asked incredulously. He had to be joking.

  “I didn’t see the others. I just saw you. And him. Now go.”

  The challenge in his eyes as he used the fucking authority he had was clear. He wanted me to fight this. He wanted me in trouble. He was a bigger dick than I realized.

  “Nash, stop this. Just go.” Tallulah’s voice got my attention. Where did she come from?

  When my eyes locked with hers, she looked upset. With me? Fuck, I’d done nothing wrong. “He knows I didn’t start this. He’s doing it because he doesn’t like me. Notice none of the football players are going. Tim started this shit, and he’s fucking free to go on to class.”

  Tallulah didn’t seem to believe me. Her eyes said as much. She’d not seen this. She was just showing up.

  “I’m not telling you again. Go to the office,” Coach D said firmly.

  “Come on, let’s go,” Haegan said, not looking too concerned about this.

  “We didn’t fucking do anything wrong,�
�� I argued.

  “And he doesn’t care,” Haegan said, pointing out the obvious.

  I glanced back at Tallulah. She was frowning. Disappointed. Fuck that. Whatever.

  I started down the hallway, and Haegan fell into step beside me. “I got some of this shit on video. It’s gonna make for a great vlog,” he said once we were away from everyone else.

  I turned to look at him and saw he was grinning.

  “How the hell did you video that?”

  He held out his wrist. It looked like some kind of watch. “This.”

  Well, damn.

  Was That Allowed?

  CHAPTER 27

  TALLULAH

  I sat my books down on a desk. My stomach was in knots. Nash had been . . . different. Not as much like the old Nash either. Just different. He’d seemed angry at me, but I had been trying to get him to stop before he got suspended.

  Haegan Baylor was not a good friend. I didn’t know him really, but Nash had changed quickly in the short time he’d been around Haegan. Or at least it looked like it from what I had witnessed just now.

  “Teenage boys have a lot of growing up to do. Don’t look so down. It’s typical. They’re hotheaded, selfish, and it’ll be years before they’re smart enough to listen to a woman.” Mr. Dace’s voice startled me. The room had been empty when I entered. Everyone was still out in the hallway talking about the fight, no doubt.

  I shrugged, not wanting to look at Mr. Dace. I was close to tears, and that seemed silly. I was embarrassed.

  “Tallulah, don’t let it upset you. He’ll regret it once he figures out he was an ass.”

  Had he been an ass? Or was I overreacting? I lifted my head and met Mr. Dace’s concerned gaze. “He’s a nice guy. He’s fun. He’s kind. He was kind to me when no one else was. It’s . . . this isn’t . . . it’s just not him. He isn’t like that.”

  Mr. Dace frowned and walked around his desk until he was standing only a few inches from me. “Are you sure? Do you know him that well? Because every interaction I’ve had with him he’s been all those things. He’s young. Quick tempered. Immature.” He paused and glanced toward the door. We were still alone. “You aren’t. You’re more mature than any seventeen-year-old girl I’ve met and many twenty-something females I’ve known. You have your head on straight. You have a goal. You’re beautiful, smart, and the world is at your fingertips. Don’t waste it on a guy who doesn’t see all that.”

  The kindness and sincerity in his eyes kept me from defending Nash some more. Instead I said something else. “You think I’m beautiful now. You didn’t see me before.” I was tired of my looks being pointed out. That shouldn’t be the way I was measured.

  “No, I didn’t. But I wasn’t talking about your outward beauty, although there is that. I was talking about what is inside.”

  Oh. Well . . . Oh.

  “Good fight, Coach D,” a voice said jokingly, and the moment was gone. Mr. Dace stepped back and turned his attention to the students now entering the room.

  “Fighting is never good,” he replied, taking his spot behind his desk.

  “Maybe not to you, but the rest of us were entertained,” another guy said as he dropped his books on his desk.

  “I thought Nash was going to go all bad-ass like the good ole Nash we all know and miss. I think he may be coming back to us.” That comment came from one of the guys on the football team, I think his name was Eric. I looked at him, but I felt the heat from Mr. Dace’s stare and shifted my gaze to meet his.

  He didn’t have to say anything. I could see the “I told you so” in his eyes.

  Was he right? Did I not know Nash at all? Had what I’d seen today been the Nash he once was?

  I sat down in my chair and opened the notebook I’d need for class. I didn’t listen to any more of the conversation, nor did I look at Mr. Dace. He’d been trying to help me. I understood that. But I didn’t want to be warned against Nash. I knew a guy they didn’t. I refused to believe the guy I had seen over the years wasn’t what I thought he was.

  Mr. Dace saw me for who I was, past my clothing size. But he was an adult. It was different. He was mature enough to see past what my body looked like. Although I doubted I’d ever see him dating a fat girl. I should have pointed that out, but I didn’t.

  Class began, and I took notes. Mr. Dace’s eyes lingered on me too long at times, as if he was trying to get a message across to me. I stopped looking up at him. I wasn’t giving up on Nash. Not when I had loved him most of my life, and now I had a chance to be with him.

  That was if he wasn’t angry with me. He’d left upset with me. I worried about it all of class, and I would have texted him if Mr. Dace hadn’t been watching me so closely.

  The bell seemed to take forever, but when it did ring, I jumped up and hurried for the door. I was almost out of it when Mr. Dace called my name. I paused, wanting to keep going, but he was my teacher, and I knew I couldn’t ignore him.

  I went back to his desk, and he watched the room until it cleared before looking at me. “I didn’t mean to upset you. I just don’t want to see you hurt. You deserve better.”

  I could argue that Nash was special. That I was lucky to have his attention or interest or whatever it was I had. But I didn’t. I wasn’t sure I even had that anymore.

  “Okay,” I said instead.

  “If you ever need to talk,” he said, and held out a small piece of paper to me.

  I reached for it, unsure what it was until it was in my hand. It was a phone number. His phone number. Was that allowed? A teacher giving a student their number to talk?

  “Thanks,” I said nervously.

  “Call me. I’m always available for you.”

  Again that felt strange. Funny. Like it wasn’t exactly meant the way it should be. No, I was overthinking this. Mr. Dace was just being nice. He was concerned, and that was what a good teacher was. Besides, he was gorgeous and had an equally gorgeous girlfriend somewhere, I was sure. I was reading way too much into this.

  “Okay, I will,” I said, then headed for the door. I needed to find Nash.

  Stepping into the crowded hallway, I searched for any sign of him, but he wasn’t out here. Neither was Haegan. If I walked to his next period, I’d be late for mine. I debated going to look for him but decided if he wasn’t at lunch, I’d go find him then.

  “Suspended. Both of them. Three days,” I heard someone say in the crowd.

  “Fuck,” Ryker Lee muttered, and shook his head.

  I didn’t have to go ask who they meant. I knew.

  Mr. Dace had sent them to the office, and they had been suspended.

  He’d blame Mr. Dace, although I would argue he’d just been doing his job. I pulled my phone from my pocket and texted Nash on my way to class. By the time I reached the door, he still hadn’t responded.

  I felt sick. My eyes burned with unshed tears. Quietly I made my way to the back of the room and found a seat. Hopefully, I’d be left alone. Ignored. Like I used to be. I was too close to crying, and I needed to get this day over with.

  Maybe Nash would text me back soon. Maybe.

  Like the Mature Guy I Was

  CHAPTER 28

  NASH

  Technically, being suspended meant I wasn’t supposed to be on school property for three days. I decided I didn’t give a shit. I’d left Haegan’s house in time to be there when Tallulah walked out of the building. She had texted to check on me, and I had not responded. Simply because I wanted to talk to her face to face. Apologize. I’d let my temper get the best of me, and she was just being sweet Tallulah, worried about me.

  When she walked out, I watched her head toward me with her head down. She held her books close to her chest in a defensive way. I could tell she was upset, and I felt guilty now for ignoring her text. I fought the urge to go to her. I needed her to walk to me. I was trying not to be seen. It would just make my suspension worse.

  She finally lifted her head to check the parking lot before crossing the lane
to where her car was parked. After looking both ways, she paused, and her eyes came back to me. They widened in surprise, then she walked quickly in my direction. I made sure to smile. She needed reassurance. I shouldn’t have acted the way I did today with her. Coach D just pissed me off. I hated that man.

  The moment I smiled, she walked faster. Relief had taken the place of worry on her pretty face. Damn, I felt guilty about that. I had tried to not think about the fight and telling my parents I was suspended today. Instead, I had focused on observing as Haegan edited his video footage from the past couple of days and made a vlog out of it. I was impressed with how much time he put into it. I also had a main role in this new video. Wasn’t sure how that would go, but I went with it.

  Now, seeing Tallulah, I knew I’d been selfish just thinking about myself. She deserved a response today. If for no other reason so that she wouldn’t worry like she obviously had.

  “Hey,” she said with a soft nervous voice. I’d done that to her. I was a dick.

  I stepped closer and put my hand on her waist, moving her against me slowly before covering her lips with mine. I didn’t keep it quick. I tasted her. I didn’t care who saw or if anyone was watching. I wanted them to see. This was me making a fucking statement. To Tallulah and everyone else.

  Her hands rested on my arms, and I flexed them under her touch. She squeezed, and that only made me flex some more. I was attracted to Tallulah. She made me happy. She reminded me of what was good in this life. She made me want more. Dream of more. With her, football wasn’t that important.

  The mint on her breath was intoxicating. I didn’t want to stop. I could hold her like this, love her like this for hours and never get bored. But I would want more. I wanted more now.