Lyrics of a Small Town Read online

His hands left my face and grabbed my waist firmly then jerked me flush against him. My breasts were pressed against his warm damp skin and this time, it was me who shivered. Our kiss changed then too. Something more desperate or needy began to take over and I had never felt this inability to control my reactions as I did now.

  The moment Saul’s hand slid from my waist to the fabric of my swimsuit bottoms to the sensation of his fingertips touching the bare skin of my bottom, I realized I no longer cared about my insecurities. Those had fled and had been replaced by desire.

  Saul’s mouth left mine and moved to the spot behind my ear and then to my neck. The hand cupping my bottom slid down to my thigh and he grabbed it to pull my leg up onto his hip. The pressure from his obvious arousal against the very thin barrier between my legs made all other thoughts fade away. My body was focused on nothing else but the sensations being with him this way were causing. I tipped my head back as he began kissing down my collarbone and the tops of my breasts.

  Holding onto me, he moved us back until I felt his body hit the side of the pool and my knee press into the wall behind him. The hand Saul still had on my hip moved then and I felt the cool breeze against my nipple only a moment before his mouth pulled it into the warmth. I had to grab onto his shoulders for support and rocked my hips against him as I moaned from the pleasure coursing through me.

  I hadn’t come here tonight… I hadn’t gotten in this pool with him, thinking this would happen. Possibly I had imagined kissing but not this. In the back of my mind, I feared what this would do to me. Deep down, I knew this would make me vulnerable, but in this moment with his body against mine and his mouth tasting me, I couldn’t make myself care.

  The intoxicating freedom of taking what I wanted and enjoying it was stronger than any concern for my future. Saul’s mouth moved to the other breast and I buried my hands in his dark wet curls. I moved my hips against him and my head fell back further as the pressure between my legs caused my body to start clawing toward a release.

  Saul released my nipple and he lifted his head up to look at me. His half-lidded eyes did nothing to hide the sky blue color of them, but his pupils were so large they were pushing the color back. His hands slid to my lower back and he began to move his body with mine. His gaze never leaving me, I felt one hand brush the skin on my side, then my stomach as he slipped it into the front of my bikini bottoms.

  Breathing was no longer something I could do as I waited for his touch.

  “Hate to break up the party but you got a fucking psycho ex in here that won’t leave.” Drake’s voice rang out over the patio and with his words he might as well have tossed a bucket of ice water on our heads.

  I moved first, dropping the leg I had up on his hip, and started to back away when his hands grabbed my waist. “No,” he said. Then pulled me to him and buried his face in the curve of my neck and shoulder.

  I stood there for only a second before I placed my hands on his arms. I wasn’t sure if I had put them there to break free or not, but I didn’t do anything but stand there breathing hard.

  “Fuck,” he said in a husky voice and then finally raised his head to look at me. I saw the same frustration and disappointment in his eyes that I felt. My body still wasn’t on board with the sudden halt to the pleasure, but I was breathing again.

  He brushed my cheek with the back of his hand as he stared at me. “I’ll go deal with this. Wait for me,” he whispered.

  Did he think I would say no? Had any female ever told him no? I would wager they hadn’t. I nodded.

  He pressed a kiss to my temple and lingered for a moment then stepped back away from me and headed for the steps nearest to us, leading out of the pool. I watched him go and wondered if this had been fate. Had I been about to make a mistake and it was stepping in to keep me from it?

  The idea depressed me. I didn’t want to think being with Saul was a bad thing. I wanted to enjoy it and not think at all. If I thought too much, I was afraid of how I might see things.

  “Could you fucking hurry?” Drake’s voice called out. “She’s batshit!”

  I turned to see a white towel wrapped around Saul’s waist as he walked back toward the house. I would be lying if a part of me didn’t worry that he’d see Fleur and remember why he was with her. He would miss her or feel something for her. Just admitting that to myself was proof enough I was past the point of no return. When this was over, whatever it was between us, I was going to be hurt.

  It was clear Fleur was hurt and he had moved on from her so quickly. To me. And I had thought nothing of it. Until now. I could easily be Fleur one day.

  Twenty-Three

  I wrapped my towel around me and stood there a moment, looking out over the gulf and wondering if I should make myself comfortable on the lounge chair or leave. It had been over ten minutes since Saul went inside and I was beginning to think he might not be coming back out. The problem with my leaving was my things were inside, specifically upstairs, and I had no vehicle. Although I could walk.

  I heard the footsteps behind me and turned to see Rio walking toward me with two drinks in his hands. He was wearing red swim trunks and a Slacker Demon tee shirt. He stopped beside me and held one of them out to me.

  “Take it,” he said and I did. He then leaned forward to rest his elbows on the railing. “Drink it.”

  “Is it seltzer?” I asked him, looking down at the clear soda in my glass.

  “Yep,” he replied. “And some vodka. Drink the shit. You might need it.”

  I thought about arguing then decided he knew more about what was going on inside than I did. If he was out here to tell me that Saul was gone with Fleur then a vodka soda might help. I took a drink then shivered. It had been a while since I had alcohol.

  “Thought I’d keep you company and offer to go get your things upstairs and take you home if you want me to,” he said, while looking out at the waves. He then took a long drink from his glass. It was as clear as mine so I assumed we were drinking the same thing.

  “Should I leave?” I asked him with an overwhelming sadness suddenly settling on me.

  He glanced back at me. “Depends on what you want to do.”

  I didn’t know what I wanted to do. “Is Saul still with Fleur?” I asked.

  Rio nodded then took another drink. “Yep. She’s drunk and he had to call someone to come get her. Right now she’s screaming the house down about Saul’s new ho,” he said with a grin. “How many times you been called a ho?” he then asked me and chuckled.

  I glanced back at the house. “This would be my first,” I replied.

  “Thought so,” he replied, sounding amused.

  We stood there a few minutes looking out at the water.

  “You sure you wanna do this?” Rio asked me.

  “Do what?” I replied, already understanding him but wanting him to clarify.

  “Saul.”

  “You seemed okay with it before,” I reminded him.

  He nodded then looked back at me. “Yeah but shit like this reminds me what you are in for. Saul… he’s a good friend. He’s my best friend. But y’all, well, y’all don’t have a future. We are just getting to know each other but what I have seen of you is that you do life much differently. Saul’s life has no stability. It changes. Often.”

  I took a long drink and this time the burn wasn’t so bad. It was needed. I understood what Rio was saying and I already knew this. He was warning me and if I was smart, I would listen. But I wasn’t looking for smart. I had done that already, and my heart had still been broken. Things with Saul would never be like they were with Will.

  “I don’t expect Saul to be anything more than what he is. This isn’t about me looking for security. It’s about me not knowing or planning every step or being so careful I miss things in life. I don’t want to miss Saul because I was afraid of the end.”

  Rio sighed heavily and st
raightened up. “Okay,” he said then glanced back at the house just as the back door opened and Saul stepped outside. “Do me a favor,” Rio added. “Don’t measure Saul against anyone else. That shit ain’t fair.”

  Rio didn’t wait for me to reply. Instead, he headed back toward the house, slapping Saul on the back as he passed by. I would think about this conversation in detail later. I already knew that and there was no way I could keep from it. I could only change myself so much.

  Saul looked at the drink in my hand and then at me. “Sorry,” he said as he reached me.

  “It happens or so I hear. I don’t have an ex,” I replied with a forced smile. Failing at making light of the situation.

  “Vodka?” he asked.

  I glanced down at my glass then back up at him. “Rio thought I might need it.”

  Saul frowned. “I see.”

  He probably didn’t see, but I took a drink and didn’t say anything.

  “Let’s go inside,” he said then and nodded his head toward the house.

  “Okay,” I agreed and we walked back together.

  Saul opened the door and I stepped inside then shivered from the cool temperature of the house against my still damp body. The living room was empty. The other two must have cleared out after Fleur’s visit.

  “Come on,” Saul said and his hand rested on my lower back as he led me back to the stairs. I was thankful I would be getting on dry clothing, but it also felt as if this evening was about to end. As much as I didn’t want it to, I also knew it was probably for the best. Saul’s mood was dark again and after dealing with Fleur, I was sure he wanted to be alone.

  He didn’t stop at the room my clothes were in and I glanced up at him confused. His gaze met mine. “Your things are in my room,” he replied and we kept going down the hallway toward a door at the very end that was closed.

  He had moved my things. When had he done that?

  When we reached the last door, he opened it and stepped back so I could go inside first. I moved past him and into the room. It was huge. The ceiling was vaulted, making it appear even larger. A king-size bed sat in the center of the room. There was a black leather sofa to the right and a bar stool in the far corner. Beside it was a guitar on a stand and I paused a moment and studied that. The guitar case was on the ground beside it and was open.

  “This way,” Saul said to me and began moving toward the door that was on the left wall. He opened the door and an equally impressive bathroom was inside, complete with a Jacuzzi tub and a shower that reminded me of a rock cave or something underneath a waterfall. My bag was sitting on the white marble countertop.

  I glanced back at Saul who was standing at the door watching me. “If you need anything let me know.”

  I nodded but said nothing and he closed the door. The idea of taking a bath in his massive tub was tempting, but there was no way I was getting in there. I hurried and changed into my dry clothing then put the bikini I was wearing over the edge of his tub to let it dry some until I left.

  Looking in the mirror, I ran a hand through my damp hair and sighed at my reflection. I wasn’t going to stand here and critique myself. I walked over to the door and opened it up to find Saul sitting on the edge of the bed with a television remote in his hand. I hadn’t noticed the large flat screen on the wall when we walked in since it had been behind us. He had changed too and was wearing a black tee shirt and a pair of white shorts. He turned his head to look at me and then patted the spot beside him.

  I walked over and sat down. He reached out and twirled one of my strands of hair around his finger. “I like your hair wet,” he said as he slowly played with the strand.

  I liked his hair wet too, but I didn’t say it.

  “I don’t want you to leave,” he said as his baby blue gaze locked on mine.

  “Okay,” I replied hesitantly. Not exactly sure what he meant. He didn’t want me to leave now, or tonight, or ever.

  He smirked and dropped my hair to then run a thumb over my bottom lip. “When I’m with you, it’s different,” he said. “Nothing’s fucked up or twisted.”

  I swallowed hard, having a difficult time staying focused when he began running his fingertips down my neck and along my collarbone.

  “How is it that when you enter a room, nothing else matters anymore?” he asked me and my now shallow breathing was obvious.

  “I don’t know,” I replied.

  He grinned at me then and slid a finger under the strap of my dress. “I told myself I would just enjoy that, you being near and how it felt,” he said in a husky tone as he slid the strap off my shoulder. “I swore I would never do more than kiss you. I would keep you safe from me,” he said as he ran his palm over the top of my sundress and barely brushed my breasts underneath. His eyes dropped from mine to look at my chest.

  “I lied. All the shit I swore I wouldn’t do, I lied,” he said and I wasn’t sure who he was talking to anymore. Me or him. I also needed more oxygen than I was getting. There was no way he didn’t feel my heart pounding against my chest. I could hear it.

  “In the pool,” he said, moving to take the other strap off my shoulder. “I would have taken your bottoms off and fucked you right there. It was like I had snapped. The rest of the world was gone and all I could see was you,” he said then with one swift tug jerked my sundress down to my waist, leaving my breasts bared with nothing to cover them. “The entire time I was in here dealing with Fleur, my head was back in that pool with you, naked, straddling me.”

  I inhaled loudly and Saul moved over me his hands, grabbing my waist and pushing me back farther onto his bed. The sundress was gone now and he was over me. His hands flat on the bed on either side of my head. “I have never wanted something so damn sweet this bad in my life,” he said to me, then his mouth came down and he bit my nipple just sharp enough to cause me to cry out before his mouth moved to my neck.

  He took a small bite of my earlobe and his heavy breathing near my ear caused me to shiver. “Can I fuck you?” he whispered and I began to tremble. His tongue then traced my ear and I felt his hand slid down my stomach and inside the silk of my panties.

  When his finger slid inside of me, I grabbed at his biceps and jerked against him. Never had my body been so responsive with just words. The way he said it and the things he said had me craving him, this, in a way that had to be unnatural. Just like him there was a darkness to it that called to me. I ached for it.

  As he began to slid his middle finger in and out of my dampness, he moved back to my ear. “Can I?” he repeated.

  I was sure if he didn’t I would die from the need. I managed to nod my head as my nails sank into his thick corded arms.

  Saul kissed my neck then and growled low in his throat as he moved his way down between my breasts then to my stomach. With his free hand, he reached for the back of his shirt and jerked it off then tossed it away. His perfectly sculpted chest and arms were on full display and made the yearning inside me become even more fierce.

  He bent his head and pressed a kiss to my stomach. Then with both hands, he pulled off my panties and grabbed my thighs roughly, opening my legs. If I wasn’t so turned on, I was sure this moment would have sent me into a panic. I had never been so exposed before yet the way Saul was looking at me made everything okay.

  When he moved until his head was between my legs and the first flick of his tongue touched me, I was sure that nothing in heaven could be this good. I had never done this or had this done to me. I knew about it, of course. I read a lot of books. It was just not something I had experienced.

  Saul began to lick and with each move of his tongue, I was sure I would never be the same. He was changing it all for me. One of my hands held his head there as my fingers were tangled in his curls. The other was grabbing onto the quilt beneath me for support. I cried out his name as he began to suck the sensitive nub that felt as if every nerve ending in
my body was connected to that one spot.

  I was so close to exploding with an orgasm when he stopped, stood up, removed something from his pocket then took off his shorts and tossed them aside. He opened the small package in his hand and rolled a condom down over his hard length then crawled back over me, moving my right leg out and opening it farther with his knee as he did so.

  I stared up into his eyes, panting from my deliriously crazed desire. Maybe later I would feel guilt for the way my body was reacting to him, but I couldn’t see how. This was a euphoria that I would never regret.

  Saul lowered himself and when I felt the hard tip press against me, I was ready to beg him. His gaze was locked on mine. I stared up at him very close to begging him.

  When he finally pushed inside me, I cried out in relief and with pleasure.

  “Holy fuck,” he said as he stilled once he was fully inside. He lowered his forehead to mine. “Christ, Henley, you’re so fuckin tight.”

  He moved then and I whimpered, unable to say words. He groaned as he rocked his hips and I clawed at his back as the release I knew was coming began building again inside me. I didn’t know what I was saying or if it was even words. I cried out Saul’s name and possibly begged him for more. I couldn’t be sure. I was lost in the experience.

  “So fucking wet,” he said once. He made his own noises as we began to get more frantic.

  “SAUL!” His name tore from me as I finally shattered into a million beautiful pieces.

  “That’s it,” he said on a groan. “Come for me, baby.” Then he shouted as he pumped into me several times before he stilled and then moved off of me, taking my body in his arms and pulling me with him.

  We lay like that, breathing hard, exhausted and sated. Nothing else mattered but what had just happened. It was one of those brief moments in life when there is nothing wrong but everything is right.

  Saul’s fingers trailed down my back slowly. I closed my eyes tighter and pressed into his chest. I could stay right here and be happy for the rest of my life.