You Were Mine Read online

  “As for the pregnancy, I wasn’t using the phone my parents paid for. I left that behind. I was saving money to get my own. I was going to call you as soon as I had it. But I was worried about you, and after a month, I used a phone in my hotel room to listen to my voice mail. That was when I got all your messages. My world fell apart in that room.”

  Bethy let out a sad laugh and shook her head. “We were so young then. Do you even remember those kids? I forgot how it felt to be them that summer.”

  I hadn’t. “We may have been kids, but what I felt for you was real. It never changed or faded. Not once.”

  We sat there, neither of us speaking, as the sound of the cars on the street and the neighbor’s music above us filled the silence between us.

  I watched her, and she stared off at the wall, lost in thought. So much had changed since that summer when she’d walked into my life and lit it up.

  “What I said when we were on the island—I was wrong,” she said, swinging her gaze back to me. “I was terrified because I had done the things we had done and not once felt guilty about it. I hated myself for not feeling guilty. But I do want to live my life. Walking through it numbly is lonely, and you’re right, Jace wanted me to live.” She paused and closed her eyes tightly. “I think, that is, if you want to, I think I’d like us to see each other more. Not exclusively, just casual. Maybe. If that would be something you would want to do.”

  Not exclusive? Fuck. I controlled my reaction and kept my expression neutral. She was offering me an olive branch, or at least a very small twig, but it was something. It was better than what we had right now. “Yeah, I’d like that,” I replied.

  She smiled, and the relief in her eyes made everything worth it. “Really?” she asked, as if I was going to change my mind.

  “Absolutely.”

  She looked around awkwardly with a silly grin on her face, then glanced back at me, unsure. “Is it OK if I . . . hug you?”

  I held my arms open. “Come here,” I told her, and she waited a split second before she wrapped her arms around me.

  I inhaled and held on. Dipping my head down, I ran my nose up her neck and grinned as she shivered.

  I wasn’t her number one, but that didn’t change the fact that she was mine.

  Bethy

  If a guy were to order takeout and rent a movie, would you be interested in joining him?

  I grinned down at the text message. Since our talk the other night, Tripp had sent me a couple of random texts but nothing else. I hadn’t been sure if he was busy or if he was just testing the waters. This text cleared the air a bit.

  I put the golf cart into park so I could respond.

  Depends on the guy asking. I have standards.

  After I pressed Send, I tucked my phone into my shorts pocket and jumped down to unload the leftover stock. My shift was at an end, and the sun was setting, so the course was closed. The last group had just finished up.

  When my phone vibrated, I quickly pulled it back out.

  He’s tall, extremely good-looking, great smile, knows you like the chicken fettuccine alfredo at Gambino’s, and intends to have that and a glass of white wine waiting for you when you get to his place.

  I laughed out loud, then looked around to make sure no one saw me smiling like a loon at my phone.

  Sold, I typed. I’d go anywhere for that fettuccine.

  His response was fast.

  Score. See you at seven?

  I replied: OK.

  I tucked my phone back into my pocket and got to work. I needed a shower and a change of clothes before I went over there. I smelled like suntan oil and sweat. Not to mention the beer that had spewed all over me earlier. Occupational hazard of working as a drink-cart girl.

  I managed to get everything unloaded in record time and get out of there without Aunt Darla asking where I was off to. She didn’t approve of Tripp, and although she was holding something against him that happened years ago, I wasn’t sure she would let that go. I would deal with her when I had time.

  I made it to my apartment, took a shower, and changed into a pair of leggings and a top that hung off one shoulder. It was comfortable and cute. I didn’t want to dress up to watch a movie at his house. That seemed like I was trying too hard.

  This was supposed to be an easy thing.

  By the time I pulled up to his apartment, it was five after seven. His Harley was parked outside, and all the lights in his apartment were on. The first time I had walked back into that apartment after his return had been hard. Jace had wanted to throw him a welcome-home party, and I had to pretend I hadn’t lost my virginity on his sofa. Or slept in his bedroom more nights than I could count.

  Now I was walking back in there to spend time with Tripp. Facing those memories was terrifying. But that was our past, and I didn’t have to hide from it.

  I knocked on the door, and I could hear Tripp’s footsteps as he came down the hall. When the door swung open, the sight of him caught me a little off-balance. Sometimes I forgot just how sexy the man was until he was there in my space again. No wonder my sixteen-year-old heart had been stolen by him.

  His hair was damp, and I could smell the fresh soap on his skin. A gray T-shirt clung to his chest in a few places where he hadn’t completely dried off before pulling it on. The jeans he was wearing hit his hips so perfectly I was sure they had been made just for him, so that women everywhere could lust over the way his flat stomach rippled and cut into a V as it disappeared into the denim. The jeans also did wonderful things to his long legs. The muscles in his thighs flexed easily as he shifted his stance. Then there were his tanned bare feet, which shouldn’t have been a turn-on but totally were.

  I snapped my gaze back up to meet his after openly ogling him at his front door. I was thankful that he wasn’t smirking at my lapse. He grinned and stepped back for me to enter. “Just now pouring the wine,” he said as I walked in, his clean scent meeting my nose.

  Why did that make me want to lick his neck?

  “I waited for you to rent the movie. I wasn’t sure what you wanted to see. I’ve got iTunes pulled up on the television so you can scan through it and rent what you want.”

  I walked toward the kitchen, which led into the living room. “I’m in the mood for an action film,” I said, thinking that I didn’t need to watch anything romantic with him. I had been thinking about licking his neck. I didn’t need to see anything to inspire me.

  “Like I said, your pick,” he said as he stepped back into his kitchen.

  I stood on the other side of his bar and watched as he fixed us both plates. He’d ordered the same thing as me, which reminded me of the times he took me out to eat that summer. He always said I ordered better than him and ended up eating off my plate and ignoring his own food.

  “Wine.” He pushed a glass toward me. “Thanks.”

  He picked up the plates and nodded toward the French doors leading out to the balcony. “Want to eat out there? It’s prettier than in here.”

  “Yeah. Let me grab your glass, and I’ll get the doors,” I said, reaching for the glass he had poured for himself.

  We walked outside onto his balcony, and although the furniture out here was different now, my mind still went back to the first time I’d been out here with him. He set the plates down, and I shoved the memory away as I sat down in the chair closest to me. Remembering how we were then would only confuse things now.

  Once Tripp was in his seat, he looked over at me. “Not gonna lie, ordering takeout from Gambino’s brought back some really good memories.” He was doing it, too. Our past would always be there.

  “I haven’t had this in . . . well, it’s been a while,” I admitted. Because eating it had always reminded me of him. It wasn’t until Jace had started taking me there that I was able to enjoy it without the memories hurting too much.

  Neither of us said anything as we began to eat.

  Bringing up Jace wasn’t something I wanted to do. It wasn’t fair to Tripp. We had talk
ed about Jace enough. His memory would always be there. This was about us now.

  “What was the most exciting thing that happened today?” Tripp asked, and my eyes shot up to meet his. The flicker in his eyes as he held my gaze caught my breath. So many emotions in those green depths.

  Every day that summer, when he had picked me up from work, he would look at me and ask that question. It had started as his way of asking me about my day and turned into my weaving ridiculous tales that never really happened just to make him laugh. In the end, I would reach for his hand and tell him that him waiting for me in the parking lot was the most exciting part of my day.

  I held up my forkful of fettuccine. “This is by far the most exciting thing that happened today. Unless you count the fact that I rode up on Mr. Wickingham taking a leak on the tenth hole.”

  Tripp winced, then burst out laughing.

  Tripp

  A sense of warmth wrapped around me, and I inhaled the scent of vanilla deeper. Needing to hold on to it. My arms tightened, and the silky-smooth softness I held in my arms made a noise that reminded me of a purr.

  That woke me up. Squinting against the sun’s rays coming in through the windows, I took in the sight of Bethy sound asleep and snuggled up against me. Her legs were tangled with mine, while the rest of her body was half on top of me as I lay on the sofa.

  We had watched the movie last night, or at least tried to. Bethy had lain over on me at one point, and I was unable to do anything but watch as her heavy eyelids fluttered closed. While asleep, she had moved closer to me, to the point where I had to lie down so she could stretch out. The rightness of having her in my arms again as she slept gave me a deep sense of contentment.

  Preparing myself for the moment she opened her eyes and realized she’d slept on top of me was another thing. She would be angry. At least, I thought she’d be angry. After three glasses of wine on the balcony and laughing at her stories of when Blaire first came to Rosemary Beach, Bethy had relaxed considerably last night.

  I just liked hearing her talk, finding out all that I had missed in her life. She told me about moving out of her dad’s house when he married a lady name Renee, who hated Bethy on sight. My chest had ached as I listened to her make jokes about sleeping on the floor and eating noodles for months.

  I had eaten my own share of noodles and slept on floors, too, but that was something I never wanted for her. When I rode out of town, I had been determined to build a life somewhere safe, with everything she needed.

  I didn’t want her to wake up and be upset about this. I hadn’t slept so well in years, and I sure as hell hadn’t woken up this damn happy in what felt like forever. We hadn’t even kissed last night. I wasn’t pushing her. My eyes had kept fixating on her lips as she talked, but I would mentally shake myself and force my gaze back to her eyes.

  One of her legs stretched out, running down over mine as she began to stir. I eased my hold on her when I realized I’d pulled her to me so tightly it was probably what was waking her up. My subconscious was trying to keep her here in this spot. She let out a soft yawn, and the fingers she had sunk into my hair during the night began to move. Then she went completely still, and I knew my Bethy was finally awake. I gave her a moment to assess things. Yes, she was all kinds of tangled up with me, but we were fully clothed, and nothing was touching anything it shouldn’t. When she turned her head and buried her face in my chest, I smiled. Maybe she wasn’t going to jump up in a panic.

  “I’m so sorry,” she mumbled against my shirt.

  “For what?” I asked, smiling down at the top of her head.

  She let out a groan that was beyond adorable. “I fell asleep on you.”

  I shifted and tilted her head up so I could see her face. “Never apologize for that. Ever.”

  She studied me a moment, then licked her lips and dropped her gaze. “I’m smothering you. Can you even breathe?” She still sounded embarrassed. She started to get up, but my arms tightened around her. I wasn’t ready for that just yet.

  “I slept better than I’ve slept in years. You’re the best blanket I’ve ever had,” I teased, trying to ease the nervous stiffness in her body. I had liked her all soft in my arms. I wanted that back.

  She let out a laugh and dropped her forehead back to my chest. “Wine after a long day in the sun knocks me out,” she said with an apologetic tone still in her voice.

  “Then I’ll have to remember to do that often. What are you doing after work tonight?”

  She lifted her head, and the smile on her lips made my heart clench. That was my Bethy smile. The one she used to give only to me. “Seeing you two nights in a row isn’t casual dating,” she said, as if I needed reminding. I didn’t want to think about what that meant. She didn’t want to be exclusive, which meant she could date other people. If that actually happened, I wasn’t sure I could be held responsible for my actions. The idea of her out with anyone else drove me crazy. I wasn’t letting that happen. How the fuck I was going to stop it was another thing.

  “Sure it is. We ate, talked, watched a movie, and fell asleep completely clothed. That’s very casual. Let’s do it again tonight.”

  The smile on her face grew, and she shifted again. Reluctantly, I eased my hold so she could stand up. If I held her down, she might not come back. I could always tie her ass to the bed. That would fix this casual-dating shit.

  Bethy stood up and raised her hands over her head to stretch, leaving me with a small glimpse of the smooth skin of her stomach. The leggings she was wearing molded to every curve, and I was close to begging her to turn around and stretch again so I could see her ass in them. The shirt she wore almost covered it up. Last night, all I got was a hint of what it was covering up.

  “Today is my day off. I have to do grocery shopping, clean my apartment, and—”

  “Go visit Nate, stop by the post office, and get your mail. Then you go to the beach and stand in the spot where we lost Jace,” I finished for her. I had followed her for months. I knew her typical schedule for her day off. I didn’t want to remind her of Jace, but he was a part of her life. Our life. I wanted to remember him. I wanted to be able to say his name without worrying that she would shut me out.

  She blinked at me as if she was surprised that I knew all of this, but there was no sadness there. The guilt and regret didn’t cloud her eyes. She turned to walk over and pick up her shoes and slip them back on. It wasn’t a secret that I followed her. She knew that.

  Sitting up, I ran my hand through my hair but decided I didn’t care if it was messy. I leaned forward, resting my elbows on my knees, as I watched her search for her purse. She needed to put space between us, and if I wanted this to happen again, I was going to have to let her.

  “Tomorrow night?” I asked, knowing she didn’t need me to elaborate on what I wanted.

  She turned back to me, and I could see the wheels turning in her head.

  “There’s a birthday party for Mr. Emerson at the club tomorrow night. He’s turning eighty. People are coming in from out of town. It’s a big thing. Woods asked me to work it.”

  Mr. Emerson was London’s grandfather. Bethy’s eyes said what she wasn’t saying. She expected me to be there with London.

  I’d actually forgotten about London’s asking me to go with her. I had turned her down. After the barbecue, I knew I was wasting my time and hers. She didn’t fit into my world. We had been good together once, but I had broken away from that life, and being near London reminded me of why I’d run from it.

  “I won’t be there. There was nothing to end in the first place, but I told London we weren’t going to work. She’s a part of a world I don’t want.”

  The relief in Bethy’s eyes flashed before she covered it up by glancing away. “Oh, OK,” she replied.

  “After the party?” I asked. I wasn’t giving up.

  She fiddled with the hem of her shirt. “I’m always so exhausted after a big event at the club, so I won’t be much company. I’ll just want to ea
t and sleep.”

  I was completely OK with that. “I’ll feed you and give you a killer foot massage, then let you go to sleep.”

  The internal battle playing out across her face had me holding my breath. “OK. But you don’t have to supply the food. We get sent home with tons of leftovers from these things. I’ll have plenty for both of us.”

  Mentally, I jumped up and punched the air with a shout of victory. In reality, I managed to stand up calmly and nod my head toward the kitchen. “Great. You want some coffee before you leave?”

  Bethy

  I held my shirt up to my nose one more time before I pulled it off and inhaled. It smelled like Tripp. And he smelled wonderful. Closing my eyes, I let myself remember how good his hard body felt under mine when I had woken up.

  I vaguely remembered being unable to hold my eyes open last night and leaning over to lie on his shoulder. I wish I’d been awake for more of that. I felt like I had missed out. But then, if I’d been awake, there was no way I would have slept on him.

  Wearing this shirt all day was tempting, but that would make me creepy. I pulled it off and started to throw it into the dirty clothes hamper and stopped. I dropped it onto my bed instead. I was sleeping in it tonight, and I wasn’t going to let myself think about how weird that was.

  Agreeing to go over to his house again so soon was probably a bad idea. It made things appear as if they were moving too fast. I had to protect my heart with this man. I already knew he had the power to shatter me. But when he had said he wasn’t seeing London anymore, I had caved.

  Knowing he didn’t want to be a part of the world she lived in eased my mind. Tripp never spoke of his parents, and they didn’t live in Rosemary Beach. They hadn’t been in Rosemary since Jace’s funeral. But summer would be back soon. What if they returned? Tripp hadn’t had to deal with them yet. Would they push him? Would he run away again? I couldn’t get onto his bike and ride away. Even if he asked me to. My life was here. My job, my friends, my security blanket. Everything was here.