The Best Goodbye Read online

  “Thank you for today. I know she had fun,” I said, as I gazed at my daughter. She was my world. I would never be able to thank Mrs. Baylor enough for being so good to her.

  Mrs. Baylor stood up and cleared her throat softly. “Well, it looks like you have company.” Her voice held an amused tone.

  I turned back to see Brad stepping out of his truck. He looked uncertain about whether he should proceed.

  “He’s a friend from work. I’ll just go explain that Franny is asleep and send him on his way.”

  “Nonsense. You need to make some friends, and from where I’m standing, that friend is a fine sight.”

  My face flushed red. “Franny waited up for me. I want to be here if she wakes up.”

  “And you can be. But that doesn’t mean you can’t fix that young man a glass of wine and invite him to sit on your lovely porch. The stars are beautiful tonight.”

  I doubted Brad drank wine. He seemed more like a beer drinker. And he was hungry. All I had was leftover chicken pot pie from the night before. I did have the makings for a pizza, though. Franny and I had pizza night once a week, so I always kept the kitchen stocked with what we needed.

  Mrs. Baylor patted my arm as she walked past me. “You’ll figure it out.” Then she smiled over at Brad before walking across the yard and toward her house.

  I wasn’t sure if I should even bring up making a pizza here. He seemed really excited about the place in Grayton Beach. Asking a guy over for dinner wasn’t something I’d ever done. And although he was becoming a friend, I was still nervous.

  “Everything OK?” he asked, as he walked toward me. His brow was creased in a concerned frown.

  “Yeah, it’s just that Franny fell asleep. She was sick earlier this week, and she’s still not a hundred percent yet.” I paused instead of offering to make him pizza. Brad was nice enough to accept even if he didn’t want to.

  “That’s understandable,” he replied, then glanced over my shoulder at the house before looking back at me. “Would you be up for ordering pizza instead?”

  That was the reassurance I needed. “I actually have everything we need to make pizza here. I could cook for you,” I offered.

  A smile spread across his lips. “I’d like that.”

  “OK, let me wake Franny and move her to her bed. She’ll want to talk to me for a few minutes, I imagine. Come on inside. I don’t have any beer, but I do have sweet tea,” I told him, feeling a silly smile on my face that I couldn’t help. This was nice. He was nice.

  “I’m a big fan of sweet tea,” he replied.

  I wasn’t good at this, but he didn’t seem to mind. I led the way inside, then quickly made him a glass of tea. Franny slept through it all. I didn’t want her waking up and being confused by a strange man in the house. She wasn’t used to men being in our home at all.

  “Here you go,” I said with a smile, as I handed Brad the glass. “Just give me a second to move Franny.” I really wanted to ask him to step outside while I did it, but that would seem rude.

  “I’ll just enjoy the view of the water from your back porch,” he said with a wink, before heading for the door.

  It was like he could read my mind. I almost said thank you but stopped myself. When he was safely outside, I went over to the sofa and gently ran my hand over Franny’s hair. “You need to get into bed,” I whispered close to her ear.

  She stirred before slowly blinking her eyes as she tried to focus on me. “M’kay,” she mumbled, then snuggled deeper into the sofa.

  “I can’t carry you, so you’re going to have to stand up. I’ll walk you to bed.”

  “M’kay,” she said again, and held up an arm for me to take. Grinning, I helped her stand and tucked her close to my side.

  “I love you,” I told her.

  “Love you, too,” she replied in a groggy voice.

  I wanted to give her everything. All the things I never had. And for the most part, I’d done that. I had given her a stable life, and she had no doubt that she was safe and loved.

  When we got to the bedroom, she went directly to the bed and curled up without opening her eyes again. I took the covers and tucked her in, then pressed a kiss to her head.

  “Do you like him?” she whispered, opening her eyes to look at me.

  “Who?” I asked, wondering if she was dreaming. She often talked in her sleep.

  “The guy on the back porch.”

  “Oh!” I replied, surprised.

  She smiled, then closed her eyes again, pulling the covers up to her chin. “Save me some pizza for tomorrow.”

  With a laugh, I kissed her one more time before going to join Brad outside on the porch.

  Captain

  Twelve years ago

  I waited outside the school for Addy. Every day, she’d meet me out here, and we would walk home together. Once we had ridden the bus, but when I’d punched a kid in the noise for shoving Addy out of his way and knocking her to the floor, I’d been suspended from bus privileges. Which was fine with us. We enjoyed the walk home.

  Addy always told me about her day, and I loved hearing her talk. She’d laugh at things I said, and I’d try my hardest to be funny. It felt like those laughs belonged to me. Addy didn’t laugh enough at home. My mother made sure of that. But every chance I got, I gave her a reason to laugh. It gave me more pleasure than anything else.

  The doors opened, and Addy stepped outside. Her blond curls hung down her back, and she squinted into the sunlight as she looked for me. Stepping forward, I waved my hand, and just like that, her face lit up. Again, that smile belonged to me. She only gave it to me. My chest got tight every time.

  “Hey, River, are we still on for Friday night? My parents are out of town, so you could come over and watch a movie.” It was Mallory Buchanan, who came up beside me and flipped her hair over her shoulder dramatically.

  “Yeah, sure,” I agreed.

  Mallory had been flirting with me for two weeks, so I’d asked her out for Friday. I didn’t usually flirt with girls or talk to them in front of Addy. I could see it made her uncomfortable whenever I did. I glanced back at Addy and saw that her smile was gone and she was walking more slowly. She wasn’t in a hurry to get to me now. Why did Mallory have to talk to me out here?

  “Yeah, I gotta go,” I said to Mallory, without taking my gaze off Addy.

  I hurried toward her. The forced smile on my face was meant to ease her mind. Addy had become my best friend. She understood me in a way no one else did, and I got her, too. We looked out for each other and told each other everything. Except that I tried not to bring up girls in front of her.

  “Hey, you,” I said, when I got close enough.

  “Hey,” she replied, and her cheeks turned a light shade of pink. “I didn’t mean to interrupt you.”

  She always did this, always acted like she was in my way. I knew enough to be careful around her, but I hated that she thought she wasn’t more important than those other girls. She was the most important person in my life. She always would be.

  “Don’t be silly. You’re my favorite girl. You know that,” I said, and put my arm around her shoulders to pull her in for a quick hug. “How about when we get home, we go out to the pond and do our homework there?” She loved the pond. We had to walk along a path through the woods behind our house to get to it, but she loved going.

  The smile I’d been looking for was back as she nodded her head. “I’d like that.”

  I’d dreamed about her again. But this time, there was no blood. It had just been us. The way we were. The easy way I felt around her. Seeing her smile at me and feeling complete with her.

  Standing out on the bow of my boat with a cup of coffee, I watched the sun rise while memories of Addy came back to me. It wasn’t that I’d forgotten those moments. I remembered everything about her. Every single moment we’d had was forever etched in my brain. It had just been so long since I’d given in and thought of them.

  The sharp pain in my chest was tucked
in so tight I wouldn’t be able to shake it loose. It came with the memories. It was why I tried not to remember. But as I stood here on the water, watching the beauty of the morning sun slowly lightening the sky, it felt right. Addy loved water, and she loved to watch the sun rise. We’d watched so many sunrises together. She would have adored living on a boat. It would have been an adventure. As long as she’d been with me, she’d been up for anything.

  I heard footsteps coming up behind me. I knew from the heaviness of the footfalls that it was a man. Someone with purpose. I didn’t need to turn around. Listening was more important than seeing in my line of work.

  “Cope,” I said, then took another drink of my coffee while the sun blazed bright over the water.

  “Cap,” he replied. Both of our names had been shortened by DeCarlo. His was Copeland, but everyone called him Cope.

  “I don’t work for DeCarlo anymore. Can’t see why you’d be here.” I never doubted that DeCarlo would try to pull me back in. He hadn’t wanted me out. But the small sliver of my soul that I’d been able to hold on to was the piece that only Addy’s memories kept alive. I hadn’t been willing to lose that.

  “Came to warn you,” he said, in what always reminded me of a growl. He was the angriest human I’d ever met. Combine that with his massive frame, and he could be intimidating. He was a solid brick wall covered in tats. “Someone’s here. Don’t know who, but they traced you here.”

  I frowned. “Someone after me because of a former job?”

  He shrugged. “Don’t know. You’ve just been tracked down. Keep your eyes open.”

  Shit. I didn’t want to bring my former hell anywhere near my sister and her family. “How long they been here?”

  “At least a month. Maybe more.”

  And they still hadn’t done anything? That wasn’t typical. This was screwy. “I’ll find them.”

  “I’ve got to fix some of Major’s shit,” Cope said, then headed back down the dock. He wasn’t a man of many words, but I’d always liked him.

  I wasn’t worried about someone tracking me. If they were here, they wouldn’t sneak up on me; I’d feel their presence first. Only a matter of time before I figured out who it was.

  Rose

  I had touched up my roots last night after Brad left, so my hair was an even darker red today. Coloring my blond hair wasn’t something I had wanted to do. It was high-maintenance, but it was part of my cover. That and the glasses made me look different enough from the girl he once knew. I had also grown up, and my cheekbones were more defined, my breasts had filled out, and my hips had a flare to them after giving birth that they hadn’t had before. I’d also lost that twinkle of wonder in my eyes.

  On that first day, I’d believed deep down that he’d recognize me anyway. That he would know who I was, that my facade would be in vain, because he’d be a wonderful man who knew me instinctively and would adore our daughter once I told him about her. But that hadn’t happened. He’d hardly even glanced at me. The most he’d ever spoken to me was to tell me what I needed to do.

  Last night, when Brad and I had our pizza date, I’d realized that I missed having that kind of connection. I hadn’t experienced it in my adult life. Someone to laugh with and talk to about adult stuff. I wasn’t saying I could fall in love with Brad, because honestly, I didn’t think there was even a slight chance. As much as I didn’t want to admit it, River still held a large piece of my heart that Captain hadn’t been able to kill.

  Sometimes, when he wasn’t looking at me, I could see his thoughtful expression as he worked something out in his head, and I’d feel like I was in the presence of River in that moment. Those little glimpses were enough to keep a firm hold on my heart. But loving River had been my world. You can’t tell your heart to stop loving someone. I’d been trying that for years, simply to ease the ache of losing him.

  Taking a deep breath, I walked into the dining room ready to face another day. I expected to see Elle ordering everyone around, but instead there was River—Captain—shouting out commands and complaining about things that had been done wrong. I quickly hurried over to listen to him before clocking in and putting away my purse.

  “The flatware has to be rolled to the specifications given. Elle gave three classes on this, and all of you needed to attend at least one. The flatware rolling will be done by every server every night at close until there are three hundred prepared and ready to go. This shit isn’t anywhere near right. Can one of you demonstrate how this should be done?”

  No one raised their hand. The strained look on Captain’s face had silenced them all. Stepping forward, I held my hand up. “I can.” I’d been through two of Elle’s classes, and she’d taken every opportunity to make an example of me. I had wrapped more than thirty sets all by myself one day, because she kept saying my work was sloppy. I had no doubt I could do it.

  Captain’s eyes locked on me, and he picked up a linen napkin and a set of flatware. “Show me.”

  I didn’t let his piercing eyes intimidate me, but I also didn’t hold his gaze. There was always the chance that he’d finally see the eyes behind the glasses. I took the supplies and placed them on the table he was standing beside. Then I wrapped them up more perfectly than anything Elle had ever done.

  “Looks like someone paid attention.” The relief was obvious in his voice. “Elle is out for the next few days. I need you to teach this bunch how to do this,” he said in a soft tone, then lifted his gaze to everyone else. “If you can’t wrap the fucking flatware properly in two days’ time, you’re fired. Is that understood?”

  The tension in the room was heavy, but they all replied in the affirmative. That meant I had the rest of the day to teach them the proper way to wrap flatware.

  “Good job,” Captain said, in a voice that stirred memories. There was kindness in his tone. Almost as if he felt we were a team. We had been the best team once.

  “Thanks,” I replied.

  “If any of them give you a hard time, let me know. I’m not opening this place with any slackers on board. There’s a pile of applications on my desk from people who would gladly take their places.”

  I didn’t doubt that. Other than the Kerrington Country Club, this was the only place in town that would bring in big tips.

  “OK,” I said, looking away from him and back down at my hands.

  “Get to it,” he barked at the rest of the room, causing me to jump. Then he patted my shoulder and walked out of the dining room.

  The grumbles and complaints started as whispers and grew louder quickly. I thought I caught Elle’s name a few times. No one seemed concerned with doing what he’d just ordered them to do.

  “Hey, Rose, you good?” Brad asked, as he stepped into the dining room from the kitchen.

  I held up a napkin in my hand and forced a smile. “I have to teach everyone how to roll flatware,” I explained.

  He looked around at the others, noticing their lack of concern, then frowned. “Hey!” he called out, getting their attention. When all eyes were on him, he pointed to me. “Y’all need to learn how to roll the fucking flatware, and Rose doesn’t have all damn day. Pay attention.”

  Several of the females smiled at Brad as if they’d do whatever he wanted them to do. He was single and attractive, so I didn’t blame them. They stopped gossiping about where Elle might be and listened as I started the first of many lessons that day.

  • • •

  The word was that Captain had broken things off with Elle, and she was at home, pouting. Whatever the case, I was relieved to have a break from her for the next few days. But it was too much to hope that she wouldn’t come back. Girls like her didn’t give up without a fight.

  Once everyone was clued in about why Elle wasn’t at work, they seemed more willing to listen to the flatware lesson. Brad checked in on me every thirty minutes or so to be sure I had their attention. I liked that about him. He was helpful and seemed to care. Again, it was a nice feeling. One I hadn’t had in a very long tim
e.

  “Hey,” Brad said now. “I tried a new entrée today for the menu. You interested in helping me taste it? We could eat it here or go back to your place and share it with Franny. A kid’s opinion might be good.”

  I lifted my eyes to meet his while I polished the tables. I hadn’t heard him come in, but there he was again, being nice. “Uh, yeah. That sounds good. I mean, going to my place. Franny will need dinner.”

  A grin broke across his face, making him appear even more handsome. “Great. I’ll pack everything up and meet you back here in a few.” He hurried back to the kitchen.

  With a pleased smile on my lips, I bent down to finish polishing the thick mahogany wood of the tabletop I was working on. Captain had said they needed to shine.

  “You and Brad seeing each other?” Captain’s deep voice filled the room, making my heart flutter. Frustrated, I shoved the feeling away and stood up to look at him. His expression wasn’t friendly or curious but, rather, stern.

  “We’re, uh, friends. I think,” I replied. Because honestly, I wasn’t sure what we were yet.

  “You think?” He seemed annoyed by my answer.

  Straightening my spine, I held his gaze and gave him back the same annoyed expression he was giving me. “I don’t see how this is your business.”

  A smirk touched his lips, and he tilted his head slightly to the left, but his eyes were hard. Nothing like River’s. Not when he looked like that. “Brad’s the best chef in the Southeast. I won’t fire him. It’ll be you that’s gone if things don’t work out. Understood?”

  The ache in my chest was back. I hated seeing this side of him. It was something I’d never experienced directed at me. Letting go of the past was hard, but he was making it easier with moments like these. I’d never be able to say goodbye to River—he’d always be a part of me—but I was preparing myself to let go of him.