Once More Chance (Chance #2; Rosemary Beach #8) Page 9

  “But there’s still a risk. Why? Why would you do this to me? You know I need you. This—this . . . thing isn’t even a baby yet. It’s just a fetus. It can kill you, Harlow. I can’t allow anything to take you away from me. Your mother wouldn’t want this. Emmy would be heartbroken. Is this a religious thing? Is this some shit your grandmama taught you? Because it’s bullshit! Do you hear me! Bullshit.”

  “Daddy! Stop. I want this baby. It’s our baby. Mine and Grant’s. I love this baby—and it is a baby, not a thing. It’s our baby, and I love it so much.” My voice broke, and Grant was beside me in an instant, his arm wrapping around my shoulders.

  Kiro shifted his gaze from me to Grant, and a furious gleam lit his eyes. “This is your fault,” he said.

  “Daddy, no—”

  “If she dies, I will kill you. Do you understand me, boy? I will end you.”

  “Daddy, stop—”

  “She’s all I’ve got. You can make babies with some woman who won’t get killed by it. You didn’t have to knock up my baby girl—the only fucking thing I have left of Emmy.” Kiro shook his head. “You don’t know what it’s like to love someone like I love Emmy. You have no fucking clue. And Harlow is part of Emmy. My Emmy.”

  My stomach felt sick, and my chest hurt. I hated hearing him talk about Emily, my mother. He still grieved over the life he had lost with her. It broke my heart over and over again now that I knew the truth behind my father’s rock-and-roll image.

  “Harlow is my world. I love her, and I will do anything to protect her. She’s my only concern. But she also wants this baby. I won’t force her to do something she doesn’t want to do.” Grant’s words sounded grave and tense.

  Kiro continued to glare at him. “Really? Because you sure weren’t thinking about keeping her safe when you fucked her without protection,” he snarled.

  Grant flinched.

  “Daddy, please stop this.”

  “I didn’t know about her heart. I never would’ve . . .” Grant swallowed and took a deep, ragged breath. “Never would’ve done anything to hurt her. I had no idea she had this condition. I wasn’t trying to get her pregnant.”

  “But you did,” Kiro said in a hateful tone. Then he turned his attention back to me. “You’ve always known you couldn’t have kids, Harlow. It wasn’t something we kept from you. I warned you all your life that you had to be careful and take care of yourself, that your heart wasn’t as strong as others’.”

  I had lived in fear as a child because Kiro had convinced me that if I did anything exciting, my heart would stop working. I didn’t understand what was wrong with it, but I knew it was broken. I hated being broken. “I don’t want to live like I’m broken. I’m strong, Daddy. I’ve proved that over the years. I need you to believe me. Trust me that I can do this, because I’m going to. Grant can’t change my mind, you can’t change my mind, and no doctor can change my mind. I want this baby. I want our baby,” I said, reaching for Grant’s hand and threading my fingers through his.

  Kiro threw up his hands and let out a string of curses, then pointed at our clasped hands. “Enjoy that, because you’re killing her!” he yelled at Grant. “Life without the love of the woman who owns you makes it one empty fucking nightmare. Prepare yourself, because I’ve already lived this hell. I know what it’s like.” He took a step toward me and cupped my face in his hands. “I love you. You’re my girl. Always have been,” Kiro whispered, and he pressed a kiss to my cheek. Then he turned and walked out the door without another word.

  I waited for it to sink in that he was gone. He was angry, but he was leaving. I would miss him, but I knew that once I survived this, he’d come around. He would be a part of our baby’s life, and he would love his grandchild. I just had to live for all of us.

  Grant tugged my hand until I was pressed against his chest. His body was tense, and I knew the words my dad had spat at him were going to haunt him. Kiro didn’t know he had just thrown all of Grant’s fears in his face.

  “I’m going to be OK. I can do this,” I told him with a fierceness that left little doubt. I was strong. I was going to show them all just how strong I was.

  “You have to be. I can’t . . . I can’t live without you,” he said, his voice thick with emotion.

  It was my turn to reassure him. I reached up and pulled his face down to mine so I could press my lips firmly against his. He opened for me immediately, and his hands wrapped around me as he kissed me with all the love, passion, and warmth that embodied Grant Carter.

  Grant

  Blaire rescheduled her girls’ day with Harlow and invited Della along for lunch and a trip to the spa. The idea of Harlow getting pampered made me happy. As long as the people touching her were women. Blaire had assured me they would be, then laughed at me.

  I had handled the issue in Sandestin and didn’t have to work, but I knew Harlow needed time with friends. I wanted to give her space. Then Woods called and asked if Rush and I wanted to join him for a round of golf. It had been a while since we’d done this. I knew the absence of Jace would be on all of our minds.

  I had stepped out of the truck and reached for my clubs in the back when I smelled a familiar perfume. Shit. No one had told me Nan was back in town. I hauled the bag out of the truck bed, then turned to face Nan. My biggest mistake.

  “You look better than the last time I saw you,” she said with a smirk.

  “I am better. You enjoy Paris?” I asked, pulling the strap of my bag up my shoulder.

  “I always enjoy Paris,” she said as she took a step toward me and ran her hand up my chest. “I miss you. I miss the things you can do with that mouth of yours.” She ran her finger over my lips.

  I shook my head and started to step back, but I wasn’t fast enough. Nan slipped her hand into my hair and grabbed a handful, then pressed her mouth against mine. I was in shock at first but only for a second, before I shoved her back, breaking the kiss.

  “What the fuck?” I asked, furious. “You don’t get to do that shit. I’m not available, and if I was, I sure as hell wouldn’t be available for you.”

  Nan glared at me. “Not available? Don’t tell me Harlow came back,” she said hatefully. As if “Harlow” was a bad word that she hated saying.

  “Harlow is back, and she’s pregnant. With my baby,” I said with emphasis.

  Nan frowned at me. “Pregnant?” she repeated.

  I nodded, a little confused at the pride that came with that word. I hated that she was pregnant. I hated that she was in danger. But there was pride in saying a part of me was inside Harlow.

  “She can’t get pregnant,” Nan said slowly. “She has a heart condition. What the hell were you thinking?” Of all the people in the world, I expected to blame myself and scold myself for this; I never expected it from Nan. “She can’t have a baby,” Nan repeated, as if she wasn’t sure it had sunk in for me yet.

  “She’s having the baby. I’ve tried talking her out of it, but she refuses to listen to me. She won’t . . . she already loves the baby,” I explained, not missing that it was slightly odd to be explaining myself to Nan.

  Nan put her hand on her hip and studied me a moment before saying anything else. “So you’re just gonna let her have a baby that will kill her? Does Kiro know?”

  “He was here two days ago. You just missed him.”

  Nan rolled her eyes. She wasn’t a fan of her father’s. He had neglected her for most of her life and hardly claimed her as a daughter, all while he had loved and cherished Harlow. Nan held a lot of bitterness toward both of them. “Hate that I missed that,” she said sarcastically.

  “I gotta go. Rush and Woods are waiting for me,” I said, turning to leave her there. I didn’t want to chat with Nan any longer. It was weird, and I felt like I was cheating on Harlow by just carrying on a conversation with Nan.

  “Can I join?” Nan asked.

  “No, you can’t.” Blaire’s voice surprised me, and I turned around to see her walking toward us as Harlow and Della sto
od at the main entrance of the club. Harlow looked like she was on the verge of tears, and the pain in her eyes had me dropping my bag and heading for her.

  “I don’t recall asking you, Blaire,” Nan snapped.

  “You didn’t ask me. But I’m answering,” Blaire retorted. I didn’t stay there to referee. They might be related by marriage now, but those two hadn’t made any sort of bond. I doubted they ever would.

  Della was glaring at me as I ran up the stairs to where she and Harlow were standing.

  “Your car’s here, Miss Sloane,” the valet said as I approached.

  “Not ready for it just yet. Give us a minute, please,” Della replied, and she swung her angry gaze back to me.

  I studied Harlow’s face and saw her drop her eyes to stare at the ground. Something was wrong. Della was ready to hit me, and Harlow looked ready to sob.

  “Baby, what’s wrong?” I asked, touching her face in an attempt to get her to look at me.

  Harlow lifted her face, but she kept her eyes diverted from me.

  “Maybe you should ask Nan’s lips?” Della snapped at me.

  Oh. Shit! “You saw that?” I asked Harlow in a panic, and realized it wasn’t the smartest reaction.

  “Yes, the entire club saw it from the dining room,” Della answered for her. “We were just leaving.”

  Not good. Upsetting Harlow was the last thing I wanted to do. “I shoved her off. I wasn’t expecting her to do that. I was telling her I was going to play golf, and she just attacked me. I didn’t know—”

  “You kept talking to her. You didn’t look angry,” Harlow’s soft voice finally said, interrupting my excuses.

  Shit. “I told her about the baby, and she was surprised. She knows about your heart. We were discussing Kiro’s visit. And your health. I swear, we were. I know that sounds crazy, but she was actually curious. And seemed concerned, which I’m having a hard time believing, too.”

  Harlow’s eyes finally lifted to look at me, then she glanced over at Della. “OK. I’m gonna go to the spa with Blaire and Della. We can talk about it later.”

  She was still upset. Damn, I didn’t want her leaving me while she was upset. “Come home with me. We can talk. I don’t like seeing you upset. I swear to you, I didn’t kiss her. She startled me, and it took me a second to react. I feel nothing for her. Nothing, Harlow. You’re all I love. You.”

  Harlow studied my face, then nodded. “It was hard to watch,” she said.

  She could have put a knife in my gut, and it would have hurt less. Dammit, Nan. She did this shit to cause problems. I wished she’d kept her ass in Paris.

  “You shouldn’t have had to see that. I should have been prepared for her to try something like that and guarded against it. I thought after the last time I spoke to her, she had gotten the message that I’m not interested. That I’m completely taken.”

  Harlow gave me a small smile. “We have to go. I’ll see you later. Have fun playing golf with the boys,” she said, sounding less hurt and more relieved.

  I bent my head to kiss her, and she turned her face so that my lips hit her cheek. She stepped back and ducked her head. “Sorry, but she’s still on your lips. I can see her lip gloss. I can’t . . .” she said, then walked down the stairs with Della right behind her. Blaire was standing at the car and pressed her hand to her mouth to cover a laugh.

  I shot an annoyed look at Blaire, and she shrugged, then laughed again before getting into the car. Harlow glanced back at me as she climbed into the car and gave me a small wave. Then the valet closed the door, and they were gone.

  Motherfucker.

  To my precious baby,

  You have so many people in your life who love you. I imagine that you love spending time with Nate by now. He’ll be someone you can look up to, and he’ll be like family for you. Rush was always like my family. Growing up with rock-star fathers isn’t easy, and Rush and I shared that bond.

  I hope that you call them Uncle Rush and Aunt Blaire. I know that they’re going to welcome you with open arms. I can’t think of two better people to ask to be your godparents.

  Then there are Woods and Della. They’re special friends, the kind of people I never expected to meet, but once again, they’re a gift your father gave to me. He gave me so many. I expect Woods and Della will have kids by now and that you’ll be friends with the Kerrington clan. When I was pregnant with you, Woods and Della stepped in and helped me out more than once. I cherish their friendship.

  We’ve talked about your uncle Mase. He is going to be special in your life. Once he sees you for the first time, you’ll win his heart. I know him too well. He’s a big softie. Be sure to hug him often and tell him how much you love him for me. Even if I’m there with you, he will eat it up. He likes attention.

  His mother, your aunt Maryann, was your first champion. She was ready to slay dragons for you, if that was what was required. Know that if you ever need anything and aren’t sure who to turn to, you can go to her. She’s wise and full of good advice.

  Then there’s your aunt Nan. I don’t even know if you’ll refer to her as Aunt or not. I’m not sure if she’ll be in your life much or at all. I hope she is. I’m surprising myself by saying this, but I do hope you have a relationship with her. I think she has suffered from rejection so many times in her life by people who were supposed to love her unconditionally that she became bitter. It marked her. I want her to find happiness and a way to heal. Maybe we will both see that day happen. I hope we do.

  So you see, you already have a family. People who are ready to meet you and love you and be there for you throughout life. You’ll never be alone. It’s the one thing that gives me the most comfort when I lie down to sleep at night.

  Love you always,

  Mommy

  Harlow

  The sight of Nan’s hands in Grant’s hair as she kissed him was tormenting me. Della and Blaire had spent the past several hours trying to get my mind off of it, so I pretended I was over it, but I wasn’t. All I could think was that Nan was healthy. She’d be able to give him babies with no cause for fear. Healthy babies. She would be here if I wasn’t.

  The idea that Grant could love someone else someday hurt so much, but then the selfishness of that emotion made me furious with myself. If something happened to me, I wanted Grant to find happiness again. I wanted someone to love him and give him the life he deserved. I did.

  Just not with Nan.

  God, how wrong was that? What had happened to me? I was a nice person. I had always been a nice person, but now . . . ugh. I was disgusted with myself. I didn’t know what I felt. My emotions were all over the place. I was weepy all the time and clingy. I wasn’t a clingy, weepy person.

  “He’s already home. I bet he’s been pacing and worrying his head off,” Blaire said with a smile. “Don’t be too hard on him. I believe Nan really did attack him. He’ll learn to keep his distance.”

  I nodded. She was right. I knew she was, and now the idea of him being worried all day made me feel even worse. “I probably shouldn’t have been so hard on him,” I said.

  “Yeah, you should have. He gets away with too much because he’s so charming. He needed to be reminded that he can’t let that kind of thing happen. If you don’t let him know it bothers you, it could happen again with someone else,” Blaire explained.

  I trusted her. She loved Rush, but she had dealt with her own Nan battles. Nan was Rush’s baby sister and had grown up with him in their mother’s, Georgianna’s, house. Rush had spent most of his life babying Nan and taking care of her. When Blaire walked into his life, Nan hadn’t dealt well with that.

  “Thanks for today. I really enjoyed it,” I told them.

  “I’m glad we got to do it. I missed you,” Della said. Her smile was always so sincere and kind.

  “We’ll do it again,” Blaire assured us both. “Next time, though, I’m forcing Bethy to come with us. Kicking and screaming, if I have to.” Blaire had begged Bethy to come with us, but she’d said s
he had things to do at home. Blaire said she closed herself off whenever she wasn’t working at the club. It was getting worse instead of better for her, clearly.

  “I’ll see y’all later,” I told them, and stepped out of the car.

  The front door opened before my foot had hit the bottom step, and Grant was waiting for me at the top of the stairs. His face was full of concern and fear. In my heart, I knew what I had seen earlier wasn’t his fault. It still hadn’t made it easier to watch. I hadn’t been able to ease his mind when I had left him at the club. I was upset, and I wasn’t sorry about that. He would be, too, if he’d been in my position. But from the look on his face, he had worried about this all day.

  “I’m sorry,” we both said in unison.

  Grant frowned. “Why are you sorry?” he asked as I stopped in front of him.

  “For making you worry all day. I shouldn’t have done that. It was wrong of me.”

  Grant let out a groan and rubbed his face with his hand. “Harlow, please don’t make this worse. I already feel like a complete ass, and you apologizing sweetly is making me feel like a bigger one.”

  I reached up and tugged his hand away from his face. “You shouldn’t have let her get so close to you. In the future, be more guarded. But it was a mistake, and I understand that. I don’t think you wanted her to kiss you.”

  He pulled me toward him and pressed me against the door as his mouth covered mine. The mint flavor of his mouth made me wonder how many times he’d brushed his teeth. Smiling against his lips, I slid an arm around his neck and licked at the corner of his mouth, then pulled his tongue into my mouth and sucked on it.

  Grant’s hands were under my top in seconds. They cupped my breasts as he pressed his erection against my stomach. This was just what I needed after a day of thinking about Nan’s lips on Grant.

  He broke the kiss, and I had started to argue when he jerked the door open. “Get inside before we get arrested for indecent exposure,” he growled.